And the work week starts

So I started work this week and it's been a rough week already...and it's only Tuesday night.  Monday morning started out okay since Tim was still home to help me get the boys ready and over to grandma's house.  It was very hard for me to leave Miles and Caleb with my mother.  The stake in the heart though was when I told Miles "Mommy is going to work now okay, you stay with grandma" he looked at me and said "okay, bye mommy" and walked away.  Went over to the toys and started playing.  Oh....so heart wrenching for me. How could he not miss me?  How could he not be sad that I was leaving?  This made it even harder for me to go to work.

The only thing that kept me going was the idea that I was going to stop at Noah's Bagels with Tim (like before) and have our morning bite before I go to work.  So I slowly got in the car and drove to meet Tim.  For the 15 minutes we were there I didn't think about how much I missed my boys or how the day at work was going to be.  It wasn't until I got to work that that feeling of sadness started creeping back in.  I missed by boys all day.  In between the phone calls, the talking to clients about their benefits, reviewing records for overpayments....I missed them.  I wanted to be home with them.  Calling to check in on them only made it that much harder for me.  The best part was leaving work and getting to see them.

 Getting a great big hug from Miles.

It was the best to see his smiling face and get a hug.

Caleb asleep on me after nursing.

After those smiling faces it all seemed better and I thought I could do this....I can be ready to go back tomorrow.  But we had a rough night.  Caleb coughed all night and Miles had a fever.  So here we were up all night with our boys...running on maybe two hours of sleep. I debated going back in, but Miles' fever had broke and he seemed to be doing fine.  Tuesday was harder than Monday.  I worried about how they were doing, did the fever come back, was it a good decision to drop them off, and a million other things....not to mention I only had about two hours of sleep.  But I was glad when 5:00pm hit and I was heading to the car to go pick up my boys.  Let's hope the rest of the week goes by fast, really really fast.  Can't wait til the weekend when I get to cuddle with them all morning.